World's Worst Blogger

The previous June 17, 2011 post was really written some time in late September, 2010.  I think I scared myself with what I wrote.  What would somebody think if they read it?  It was a bit too honest for my taste.  Too revealing of who I really am.  Looking back now, I realize how much I hide from the world.  I used the word hide not hid because I'm still doing it.  Nobody ever knows what is really going on in my head, I guess.  I keep that tucked away.

I've gone through the motions of life these past 10 months.  Today is the 10 month anniversary of my husband's death. Life has moved on much to my dismay.  The feelings that were initially squelched have finally begun to surface.  I think I spent so much time locking my feelings away while Scott was ill in order to function that I didn't know how to start feeling again.  Or maybe it was just denial.  I'm not sure, but I bet a psychologist would be willing to pose a theory or two.

So I finally decided to post the previous post.  So far I have remained readerless so I might as well say what I have to say, right?  I've told nobody that I started a blog.  I'm probably afraid it will actually be read if I do.  So hence the title of this post is "World's Worst Blogger."  In ten months I have written only 3 posts now, and I haven't told anyone about so I remain readerless.  These strategies do not create a successful blog.  But that is fine because this is more for me than for anyone else.  Maybe some day I will get brave and share what I have written.